The Best Use for Saran Wrap

Mr. Anonymous muses

The many recent studies that show that  1. masks are ineffective at protecting mask wearers, and 2. are ineffective at protecting others who come in close proximity with mask wearers, are quite disheartening.  However there is I believe a solution.  The masks currently worn by our worried public are just too porous, and they do not fit nearly tight enough to keep those pesky aerosol particles from spreading around.  So what I propose is that everyone diligently wrap their faces tight with a good plastic food wrap like Saran Wrap and make sure that it is tightly sealed at the neck area.  This is a readily available product and saves resources otherwise dedicated to mask production, not to mention keeping the harmful virus from entering the public arena.  But just in case it may not be the answer it might be wise to do a controlled study on a well defined group…. such as CDC officials.

A friendly amendment: I understand a coat of tar and feathers enhances the seal.

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8:35 am on July 31, 2020