You’re shambling the avenue; Bluetooth stuck up your ear, thumbs-a-Twitter. Your GPS-enabled phone is piloting you to a meet-up with your pub posse. You pinch to zoom the map, but the boss’ IM interrupts with a snarl about the afternoon meeting so now you’re pondering a new spin on "the dog ate my homework."
Meanwhile your calendar is pleading about orphan dry cleaning. And at this moment, that girl from last century pings: She’s friend-ing you on Fbook, and "whatcha been up to and how come your profile says you’re single" when she thought you’d hooked up semi-permanently with that photographer?
Basically, you’ve become The Borg.
And it’s only 2009. Cheer up. It gets a whole lot deeper soon. Everyone will know literally everything about you. And resistance is worse than futile; it will be cleansed. Sometime this century – likely sooner than later – the trend lines of human vanity, self-indulgence, quest for personal perfection and general laziness will cross with those of computer processing power, machine dexterity, smart search, molecular manipulation and sensor acuity.
April 2, 2009
